Radiarc - Into Deep

(it’s free, just enter 0 in the price field) Further and further within, I delve and fall into understanding, the waves intertwining with the contours of this desolate place, breathing as I do, as I am compelled. Inward and truly, I am immersed in a miasma of frayed self, a shroud of melancholy emanating throughout my existence, singing bittersweet songs of denouement and ending. Blindness, but beyond, I know. She is here. As once before, in many forms, nature shifting in phase through all perception, an understanding I face with darkened eyes. Wild, overwhelming truth, transcending my being entirely. I am horrendous, imperfect, yet I am fixated. From bleeding eyes, I shake, coursing with despair, voices within divide the self with calls of catharsis. I witness, and I fall. Breathe. She is still as I delve, my eyes shut in contemplation. We are before one another, but there is no connection, the abstract forever shifting, forever obscuring. There, she remains, though for all I know, it amounts to nothing, and continually, I go further, all surpassing me. I hold. Breathe, and with every breath, her presence grows, intensifying, ethereal chaos writhing, never unveiling. In depth, I search, I see, but mere tangents and whispers reveal themselves, swift, shimmering lights in an abyss of thought. In sparks of revelation, I find hope, and my form corrodes steadily, becoming one with this world apart from all. I will be torn, but she remains, and so must I. Quell, breathe. There is little left but time to pass, though with every moment, I feel myself fading. I stand regardless. Into deep, I’ve cast away many things, but for all there is, all this is, I am here. Corruption, loathing. Chaos, confusion, ignorance, and I will hold. There isn’t much else that can be done, but it is the hope I have, and all the will I need. May this tree bear good fruit, for all the time it has left. Monsters walk every plane, should the vessel allow. _____ Thank you for your patience, and thank you to all who attended Mare Fair, where this song was first premiered. The con was phenomenal, the crowd was wonderful, and I honestly can’t stop saying enough good about how well things went. I was admittedly hesitant to apply as a musician there, as it’s something I’ve no experience with and I don’t like physically being in the spotlight, but when I’d heard others wanted to see me do it, I began to put forth work to make it happen. I banked on being able to make enough new music over the months to give something I felt was worthwhile, but project after project fell through and it all sounded half-baked and soulless no matter how much effort I put forth, so I remained quiet about it all. That being said, though the set was a bit of a struggle, the response was far, far greater than I could’ve expected, and I’m happy to have attended and contributed to Mare Fair. The majority of this year has hurt, and this con took everything out of me, but being able to connect with friends in a strange, but friendly and passionate atmosphere, it was an experience I’ll never forget. I still don’t feel that the stage is for me, but I have intention to do it all again, and far better. It was a reminder for me to keep trying regardless of what seems to be, because this song was finished a day before I left for the convention. The full concert can be found here: Special shoutout to the anons in the front row who moved with so much passion and thought. Many times, I felt so awkward, but seeing people move, react, to something I’ve made, it was something I could not have imagined, and if the set went on any longer, I would’ve broken down. Thank you all, all of you, for helping me get to where I am today. I never know what to make of it all, but I’m going to keep going. I still can’t read or write sheet music, and there’s a lot of theory that loses me, but many things are possible, and I’m curious as to what they will be for me. To those of you who have been watching and waiting, thank you sincerely. This is a link with nearly everything I’ve made, released and tossed WIPs, and all I ask in return is that you not reupload anything from this. Feel free to remix or sample, and let me know if you do -- I’d love to hear what you’ve made. Contact: DM Thanks to ShobieShy for hosting this, and for consistently being a great friend. Again, thank you all for listening, and I hope you enjoy this song. Everything surrounding this means a lot to me, and I wish you the very best. If you wish to support me directly: Thank you for making these years special.
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