The heavy-going theme of the album is substance addiction, the enjoyment that inevitably leads to the downfall of a person that it will bring, and how you recover from it and without it on the other side. ’Withdrawal’ refers to getting sober; about withdrawal from existing in circles and repeating cycles that are damaging and keep pulling you back in when you know you should be out; about withdrawal from ’normal’ society to focus on yourself in hope of strengthening for the battle of feeling more at ease in your own body, mind, existence; to not feel you must rely on intoxicants to get through.
’Withdrawal’ is suitably dark, tense, malevolent, spellbinding, mindbending and draining; but in the same breath, I hope it works for you the same as me, in that it purges all of those emotions and difficulties that contaminate your cortex, so what remains is something akin to the calm, contemplative, focused, softly breathing hum of the closing minute. Thank you to all who take it all in, especially with trust in me, headphones, silence or meditation.
Download here: (OWL106) and also AND (HHR028)
VIDEO for ’Something In The Blood’:
00:00 - 1. Without The Vibrations I Do Not Exist
11:05 - 2. Something In The Blood
18:10 - 3. Woeverdose
28:05 - 4. Watching Yourself Hallucinate
38:25 - 5. The Needle Is Stuck
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I won’t trigger the avalanches of stories but will give you the outline, in that I battled with alcoholism since being a teenager in the early 90s until getting and staying sober the first day of 2021. Every day is still difficult on some level, but cravings now dissipate quickly.
I’ve had some truly out of this universe epic times with drugs too, and then my intensely addictive personality led me deep into some really dark times with them. Throw stacks of major depression and anxiety into the mix and we’ve got a real volcano of justification for wanting to disappear into all the oblivions possible. I have things under control now, or at least manage to channel those addictions into more fulfilling, productive and creative outlets.
Made June 24th 2022 to January 27th 2023, with just the basic theme of Woeverdose being from an Incandescence track around 2010. 3 months of anxieties followed, leading to it remaining in a folder until the end of April, despite knowing it was complete. I managed to gather my confidence and sent it to Willard at Haunted Head.
All the pictures were taken pre-2020 in England before I moved away. The ’hope’ and catharsis in this album is represented by the black and white track pictures encased in darkly colourful cover images.
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Big thank you to Willard for putting this on his page as well. I hope you will investigate, as there are plenty of friends and their strange / noisy / experimental / interesting releases to find (including a Morbid Beauty album), and tracks of both projects on the Body Envelope Violations compilation:
Please also take some time to look at the intensely brilliant art by Willard:
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