I’M SO EXCITED.

FUND THE BALLS: Follow me on Twitter: Follow me on Instagram: Edited by me, all by myself! Look at the nuts on that fella. The monkey balls are back and bigger than ever. Thicker than ever. Harder than ever. The left one hangs a little lower than the right one. And Schlatt is raising money for a statue of the monkey, fittingly titled “King Kong Balls.“ I wish my balls were this big. I can’t even watch horror videos on TikTok without hiding in the comment section. I thought I was gonna retire a few days ago but if we get these statues I’ll keep going for at least a few more weeks. Please check out my podcast Sleep Deprived that I host with my buddies Aztrosist, Apandah, and Mikasacus - they have been good buddies of mine for years, even before I became popular on this awful website.