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Let’s run through a scenario. You’re sitting in your epic gamer chair with the built in nozzle that converts your piss into piping hot G-Fuel and you’re watching some late night television (probably one of the HILARIOUS Jimmys). Your wife walks in and gives you some Lunchables and a Yoo-Hoo (two thirds of your favorite snack), but before you can say “What, no gushers?” she grabs you so hard by the nipples, looks you dead in the eyes, and says: “You’re weak, Ronald!” (your name’s Ronald in this scenario). “If two failed real estate agents who squandered their inheritance on several tons of sand were to attack me, you’d run and I’d die! I’m giving you one business week to prove me wrong or it’s over!” Then she storms off. Your first thought is how oddly spe
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