O HOLY COW - A Christmas Parody | Marcus Bales & Don Caron

This is probably what you would call a non-political parody, although some political implications might be inferred from it. Mostly, it’s about religious holidays in the face of late-stage capitalism and it involves underwear and socks. Lyrics were provided by Marcus Bales. Executive Producers Don Caron and Jerry Pender SUPPORT Visit CONTRIBUTE to the PROJECT BTC:              33W8cvkCKupG77ChtTFXeAFmEBCaLcjsBJ ETH:    0x1f36edE7A4F06830D0e3d675776607790a2ce636  SHOP Parody Project Store: PATRONAGE To become a Patron of Parody Project please visit our Patreon Page MAILING LIST (Never Shared) LYRICS for O Holy Cow O holy cow! The stores will soon be closing It is the last night before it’s Christmas Day. Long on the couch I dreamed as I lay dozing That I had shopped, and wrapped the gifts all away. A thrill of fear at only hours remaining I just have time to hit the Dollar Store. Underwear and socks! Oh, hear the kids complaining! All spite and whine. Adulthood looms. They’re kids no more. All spite and whine, All spite and whine. Gather debris, the bows and paper scattered, The plastic bags bulging, just barely tied; So the debris of hopes and dreams are shattered, The trauma as the children sobbed and cried. This day of days thus ruined, egos battered, Each opened gift reveals the clothes inside. Underwear and socks! Oh, hear the kids complaining! All spite and whine. Adulthood looms. Their childhood died. All spite and whine, All spite and whine. Truly we’re taught to disappoint each other By giving presents that nobody wants No one’s content -- not cousins, sisters, brothers To say no word about the uncles and the aunts. In therapy we’ll always blame our mothers Our nursed resentments echoed in our taunts: Underwear and socks! Oh, hear the kids complaining! All spite and whine. Adulthood looms. Adulthood daunts. All spite and whine, All spite and whine. ABOUT THE SOURCE MUSIC “O Holy Night“ (original title: Cantique de Noël) is a well-known Christmas carol. Originally based on a French-language poem by poet Placide Cappeau, written in 1843, with the first line “Minuit, Chrétien, c’est l’heure solennelle“ (Midnight, Christian, is the solemn hour) that composer Adolphe Adam set to music in 1847. The English version (with small changes to the initial melody) is by John Sullivan Dwight. The carol reflects on the birth of Jesus as humanity’s redemption. In Roquemaure in France at the end of 1843, the church organ had recently been renovated. To celebrate the event, the parish priest persuaded poet Placide Cappeau, a native of the town, to write a Christmas poem. Soon afterwards, in that same year, Adolphe Adam composed the music. The song was premiered in Roquemaure in 1847 by the opera singer Emily Laurey. Transcendentalist, music critic, minister, and editor of Dwight’s Journal of Music, John Dwight, adapted the song into English in 1855. This version became popular in the United States, especially in the North, where the third verse resonated with abolitionists, including Dwight himself. The wide vocal range of the song makes it one of the more difficult Christmas songs to execute properly, especially for untrained amateurs. In French-language churches, it is commonly used at the beginning of the Midnight Mass. The song has been recorded by numerous well-known popular-music, classical-music, and religious-music singers. Several renditions by popular artists have appeared on record charts.